I bet if we thought about it, it wouldn’t take us long to discover how much emphasis we put on our physical appearance as women. If we actually take a step back and think about all the areas in our life that we put thought into this, it would actually be very sad. There are so many pressures for women today, there always has been, but our culture is at it’s worse if you ask me.
If each of us were stripped down, especially those in specific industries, do you know what you would see underneath it all? Probably something completely different from “its” original version.
I mean everyday, as women, we believe the continual lies, as I like to call them, from society- and give into the continual pressure of having to look a certain way.
Society has gotten “so picky” over the last few years, that there are too many examples for me to cover in one article! I think as women we all struggle in different ways with our appearance.
The first area I’d like to cover: EYELASHES.
Apparently it matters how our EYELASHES LOOK!
Think about how silly and ridiculous this really is. But we are all guilty for ravaging the drugstore isle for the Mascara that plumps, lengthens, and separates (no clumpy eyelashes for me personally)!
I can’t tell you how many mascara’s I have tried, and what a pretty penny I’ve spent trying them, only to find that only a couple delivered the way they said they would!
Now there is even prescriptions for growing more luscious eyelashes!
A prescription? How on EARTH did we ever get to this point? I mean all they are is little tiny hairs that come out of our eyelids, why do they deserve so much attention? And why are we giving into the attention the world is saying our eyelashes need?
If all the other ways to get lushes eyelashes fail, there is always FALSE EYELASHES, which I don’t think there is a celebrity around that isn’t wearing them these days. WHY all this maintenance and keep up? I keep asking myself what for?
Society also seems to be quite obsessed with BOOBS. It makes me so crazy! I mean those of us, like me who aren’t that well endowed, feel quite inferior and not good enough if our boobs aren’t a certain size, or if they droop, or if they have stretch marks.
We constantly compare ourselves to other women, and especially to the women in magazines. And then we are left completely shattered and devastated that we can’t measure up.
BUT, no need to fret, to the rescue of course, the world has a solution for us pathetic, poor excuse for boobs women! Yes yes, the ever famous PUSH-BRA!
It doesn’t stop there; available are padded bras, water bras, air bras (I actually wore an air bra on my wedding day LOL), there are even bras that you can choose how much lift you want!
And for drastic measures, you can have surgery to get FAKE BOOBS! What a revolution! Can you imagine MA INGALLS’ face if she were in a Victoria’s Secret, or at a Plastic Surgeons office? Think about it.
You can pick just the size you are looking for; want the size of melons? You’re in luck! Want the size of Tennis Balls, you’re in luck again! The sky is the limit in the boob department!
So you ladies with your size “A” droopy, stretch marked cup (which would almost be me), don’t you worry, you’ve got endless options out there to make you feel good about yourself.
But the question is, will you? Does it make you feel better? Will you be happier, more peaceful? More content?
Onto the next cultural debacle- WRINKLES. And I am the first to admit that I am totally guilty of trying to find the best eye and face creams for wrinkles. Any anti-aging products, I fall for. I admit I am addicted to lip gloss, but I’m close to addicted to wrinkle creams.
Yes, there are things we can do to take care of our skin, we ought to, but to buy into, literally all the hoopla about staying young, and the obsession of having few wrinkles as possible, is a pursuit I decided to give up. I found I can do good things and eat healthy things that are right for my skin and that is good enough for me.
In the world today, we have the best wrinkle creams, botox, plastic surgeries of all sorts. And now new found procedures that are not surgical, but are very costly-Laser treatments and Microdermabrasion.
The list goes on and on and on. There are things to help with redness, acne, age spots, pores. We could, and DO obsess, on ALL OF IT.
Another one of my favorites? The world telling me that I have to have NAME BRAND JEANS.
I understand there is something to be said for quality. I get it.
But women literally believe that they are B E T T E R do you hear me, BETTER IF THEY HAVE NAME BRAND JEANS ON THEIR BODY.
There are a TON of new brands and it is the IT thing to have. There are countless styles, cuts, color and fabric. They range from $85-$500.
One thing I am not saying, I repeat, the one thing I am NOT saying is that women should not buy name brand jeans. Not at all-DISCLAIMER: I have name brand sunglasses and have had name brand purses there is nothing wrong with that per say.
I am saying that the media, society, makes us believe, just like the MASCARA, THE BOOBS, THE WRINKLES AND NOW THE JEANS that we are BETTER, we are more important, we are worth more IF we have gorgeous eyelashes, big nice round perfect boobs, a smoother face and DESIGNER JEANS. BUT WE AREN’T ladies.
I think it is OK if any of us women do ALL of the above. But I am saying I think it’s OK if it’s done on a smaller scale, or maybe daring some of us to not do any of it at all. It takes our focus off of what really matters: PEOPLE. And what matters is finding out who we are deep down, with none of the fluff, and knowing that we have worth, with or without all of it.
If we become too obsessed, we get off track, and think maintaining and buying into all this stuff is most important.
But if I asked you why it was important for you to have gorgeous, lush, long, thick eyelashes, what would your answer be?
If I asked you why you are more important or better if you had less wrinkles, what would your answer be?
If I asked you why it was important why you had to spend money on fancy bra’s or implants so your boobs looked “perfect” what would your answer be?
If I asked you why it was important that you had designer jeans, what would your answer be to that?
If your answer is “I would feel good about myself”, then I’d have to beg to differ. Because I would agree with you that, yes, I have felt “better” about myself when I’ve done a few of these things, but it never lasts.
There will always be something I can try to do with myself to be more confident.
But I submit to you that our confidence and self esteem and feeling good about ourselves has got to come from someplace deeper, beyond the eyelashes.
So much of the time I think we are really doing it for others, not ourselves anyway, don’t ya think? Think about it. Really.
But do you want to know what I suggest? What I dared myself to do a couple of years ago? I opted out of the race to get the best lashes. I opted out of the jungle to make my boobs look “perfect”, and I’ve never bought a designer pair of jeans. I was becoming obsessed, thinking that if my eyelashes didn’t look lush, or full or long, that I wasn’t as pretty, or that I wasn’t good enough.
I was spending money at Victoria’s Secret looking for the perfect bra to ensure my funny looking boobs didn’t look funny to the world. I was so insecure, and found myself searching high and low to make my boobs look “right”. I think it’s OK to wanna feel confident, but it was messing with my head.
I had to find a good, healthy balance. It was such a false sense of security anyway, because special bra and all, and I was still insecure! Surprise surprise! Because it’s not about he lashes, or the boobs, it’s about what’s inside of us that is making us insecure!
So I stopped wearing the Push-up bra and just started wearing a lightly padded bra. I wasn’t ADDING anything to the world by wearing such a fancy bra. Nothing in life stopped or changed or was made better. So why would I spend my time and money obsessing?
In all you think about, say and do, think about if it will add to the world in a good way.
Think about those who are in survival mode, like refugees- can you imagine if they knew
how we obsessed on these things?
They are just trying to get clean water!
Or think about the disabled. They are such outcasts in this world, and I know that that is why we do what we do as women so often, we feel that we are outcasts too.
We want to fit in, feel loved and wanted.
But giving into what the world says we need, isn’t the way to do it.
So I challenge you. Are there areas in your life where you are starting to obsess, or already obsess or put too much time or care into?
Maybe it’s none of the 4 areas I’ve mentioned, but there are plenty more.
If you think of an area, ask yourself these 3 questions: why are you doing it? And why is it important? And what are you adding to the world by doing it?
I’d love to hear from you, and thanks for reading, and possibly, taking my challenge.
“You are more precious than rubies.” Proverbs 3:15
Other areas we obsess: perfectly groomed eyebrows, lip plumpers, teeth whiteners, mani's & pedi's, coloring our hair, panty lines________________________________________.